May. 19th, 2004

Every once in a while, I need reassurance that my reaction to a particular situation is not, in fact, completely nuts and that I am, in fact, reacting as any normal thinking human would. This is one of those times.

For those of you who are not aware, I don't speak to most of my mother's immediate family, specifically her four brothers. I think most of them are assholes and most of them think that I am the family disappointment.

Her nearest in age brother -- we will call him Asshat -- is married to a woman -- we will call her Crazy -- who is very strange when it comes to her children. She basically believes that they have to live VERY close to her, if not in the same house. Asshat and Crazy have two daughters -- the oldest, an attorney, is reasonable when it comes to her mother's insanity. The youngest, a spoiled selfish thing whom we shall call Brat, does all that she can to milk her mother's insanity for the most stuff. Her mother is only to happy to comply.

Brat is in her senior year of high school. She applied to a number of schools and received good news from two of them, one right near home and the other about an hour away. Brat wanted to go to the farther school and wanted to live on campus. Crazy was dead-set against this idea and insisted to Asshat that he do *something* to convince Brat to stay home and go to the closer school. Asshat, perhaps in an effort to shut Crazy up, complied. He went to Brat and basically said, "What's it going to take?"

Brat, all of 17 years old, is now the owner of a 2004 Jaguar coupe.

Asshat and Crazy, for the record, drive a Kia and a Hyundai, respectively. They are comfortable in their income but by no means what could be considered truly wealthy.

My mother told me this story, ending with, "You have to laugh." I disagreed, telling her that one doesn't have to laugh. One has to be disgusted, disappointed and perhaps even angry. (My grandfather, for the record, was LIVID when he heard this story, as he believes Brat to be the most spoiled and manipulative child on the face of the earth; he also thinks that Crazy is a total nutball.)

I am utterly disgusted at this story; I think it's RIDICULOUS for ANY 17-year old to be driving a $60K+ sports car, especially when that 17-year old's parents drive relatively low end cars worth well under $60K each. I further think that selling one's soul -- and possibly one's educational future -- for a sports car is pathetic.

I'd love some opinions on this. Yes, I know this doesn't affect my life at all -- I don't speak to these people and only have to see them at weddings and funerals. I am no longer as nauseated as I was when I first heard the story; in fact, it's slowly turning into just one more anecdote about "mia cuocca famiglia." But I am curious what people think, espcially those people who come from a comfortable-to-wealthy family background.
1. Even "escorts" wear stripper shoes.
2. Conventioneers DO call hookers, even at luxury hotels.
3. Any restaurant with an actor/actress running around playing a character of any kind is NOT a luxury restaurant.
4. One should NEVER have to wait over an hour for a takeout menu to be delivered, especially not if one is in a $300+/night room on a concierge level.
5. One should also not have dirty dishes outside one's $300+/night room on the concierge level for almost an ENTIRE day.
6. Penguins are awesome.
7. Private pools are awesome.
8. Jenna still has REALLY big tits.
9. My sister is SO CUTE in her K-9 uniform.
10. The Ritz Carlton deserves their reputation for service and, in my opinion, they are worth every penny they charge.
11. Many ladies are familiar with Donna Johnson.
12. Jaguar sedans are more comfortable than Jaguar convertible coupes.
13. Roller coasters ROCK.
14. It is possible to get very tired of foie gras, truffles, wine pairings, and ahi tuna.
15. Seven hotels and 13 restaurants in ten days is not a good idea. Fun, yes. But entirely too exhausting.
The people who love downstairs from us are doing something that is making my entire apartment vibrate.

Does that mean I live inside the world's biggest vibrator? Or the only live-in personal massager?
tuftsradiates (tuftz-rayd-ee-ayts). n. compound word for those annoying patches of hair that seem to reach farther than the rest of the hair in that region. Most often seen on scalp and pubic area.
Word origin: email porm spam trying to disguise itself as advertisements for personal grooming products.

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