lastwordy: (disbelief)
So, on Fridays I volunteer at the local wildlife rehabilitation center, the Mercer County Wildlife Center. They are amazing; donate if you can. I love doing it and wish I could be there every day. Valuable lessons are learned about wildlife and how to care for them. This is the story of my latest lesson: Fawns Are Adorable Assholes.

Currently, we have three baby fawns: Pink, Purple, and Green (that's how they tell them apart -- they mark the insides of their ears with non-toxic wax). Last Friday, we had to bring them from their outside pens to their indoor, overnight crate. In order to do this, you have to carry them inside. Of course, EVERYONE wants to pick them up, because they are precious. Diane, who is in charge of the center, is just watching and says, "Yes. they're so cute, You'll learn."

I picked up Purple -- the proper way to do this is to hold them by the chest/stomach and let their legs hang free. For the record, the fawns do not like this. At all.

Lesson 1: Fawn hooves are sharp. I am now down one Ramones tshirt.


We get them inside and I am given the task of feeding them their evening meal. This require mixing fawn formula (smells like vanilla ice cream, doesn't taste like it -- you will find out how I know that in a moment), then putting it into heavy-weight dog bowls because (Lesson 2) fawns are clumsy and will kick over anything lighter. I mix everything, heat the formula to the required temperature, and put the dishes in the pen.

First comes Pink. She is the smallest of the three, and she proceeds to curl herself up and lay down IN the formula bowl. Now I have to get her out of there. I open the pen door (when the door is open, the space is about 2.5-3" square) and reach for her. She is crabby and slippery and not remotely interested in being moved -- apparently, bowls of warm formula are very comfortable. While I am trying to get a good grip on her, Purple spies FREEDOM over my shoulder, and attempts to jump for it. His plan was not well thought out, however, and what actually happens is that he gets his head stuck between my shoulder and the top of the pen. So, NEW PLAN, he begins to vigorously kick his legs in order to gain momentum. This does not result in freedom. It DOES result in him nailing the formula bowl with one hoof, flipping said bowl up and over, and SOAKING me 300 ccs of warm deer formula

Lesson 3: Things that smell like vanilla ice cream do not always taste like vanilla ice cream.

Consider the scene: both hands occupied by struggling, slippery tiny fawn. Shoulder trying desperately to push non-slippery but very determined normal size fawn back into the pen. "But Dawn," you ask. "Wasn't there a THIRD fawn?" Why yes! There was!! And he smells dinner.

So here comes Mr. Green. A wet fawn nose is shoved at my face, all a-quiver. Then he licks my forehead and my cheek -- yes, clearly dinner. But where is the rest of it? AHA! It must be on that thing on the side of the human's head, the thing that is a little dangly and vaguely nipple-shaped. THAT MUST BE WHERE THE FOOD COMES FROM. And he proceeds to attach himself to my earlobe in order to get more dinner.

Lesson 4: Baby fawns have excellent control over their teeth. THANK GOD.

By this point, I am laughing hysterically, basically unable to move, and desperately hoping someone would hear it so they'd come and rescue me. Alas, no one did. I finally manage to put Pink down without dropping her, shoulder Purple back into the pen, grab the food bowls, and mix new dinner for them -- only two bowls this time, since Pink was not interested in using the formula for anything other than a bed. I get up, clean up the mess all over the floor, and walk to Diane's office. She looks up and raises one eyebrow. I say happily, "Hi Diane! Fawns are ASSHOLES!" And a good laugh was had by all.

Totally worth it :) I really love volunteering there and I wish I could do it full time.
I don't require reminders. I encourage everyone to remember in their own way, but please--for the sake of those who died and those who survive them--please don't encourage the endless media circus that this turns into every year. Don't give our idiot administration one more reason to parade their ignorant American biases and entitlements. It's offensive to the ones who died at 9/11, the ones who died after, and the ones who continue to die because they were lied to and told it was *about* 9/11. It should be offensive to anyone who remembers that day, as well.

Remember. Mourn the losses. Celebrate the survival. Lay the ghosts. And when 2008 comes, make the changes that so clearly need to be made.

It perfectly explains why I enjoy wearing my glasses, and why I do so adore a man who wears glasses.
The band has decided to move on without David and without Eric. The other members want to do things much more frequently and much more seriously than in the past and they felt -- rightly so -- that such a schedule would be unfair to David and Eric. This parting is as amicable as can be expected.

There will be no "farewell" show and the gig on Friday has been cancelled.

David would like everyone to know that he appreciates all your support and will make some kind of announcement if a new band appears on the horizon.

Thanks, everyone.
You knew I was going to have to comment on this... )
First I got to be thatliardesmond's partner in crime, now gkingsley is MY partner in crime. And I get to live in an ancient tomb. Maybe Brendan Fraser will drop by. Mmmm yes....


What Kind of Super-Villian Are You?
LJ Username
Pick An Evil Number
Pick An Evil Word
Pick An Evil Color
You Are A Horror Movie Villain
Your Evil Lair Is An Ancient Tomb
Your Evil Name Is Mistress Fire Blight
Your Nemesis Is bonkoif
Your Evil Hardware of Choice Is A Secret Death Ray
Your Partner In Crime Is gkingsley
This Quiz by ezralitemikey - Taken 3772 Times.
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Ahhhh....

Sep. 29th, 2004 11:25 am
Waterboys, Dead Can Dance, Hoodoo Gurus, Jesus and Mary Chain, Camper Van Beethovan, Duran Duran, Freddie Mercury, Siouxsie and the Banshees....

I heart VH1 classic.
but I don't care. Though I should note -- I want to hear NOTHING from anyone who doesn't like this band or who doesn't understand the adolescent rush that I am presently feeling. Do us both a favor and keep your opinions to yourself if yoru only response to this post is rolled eyes and a heavy sigh. Shut it, capito? Grazie. :)

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD -- JUST watched the NEW DURAN DURAN VIDEO.

It's 1984. I am 13. And they look JUST.AS.GOOD. as they did then.

All Durannies -- RUN, do not walk, to www.duranduran.com -- the link for the video is there.

And pre-orders for the new CD are being taken. The Limited Edition comes with a DVD. I may swoon. Someone call Simon and John so they can hold me up and fan me.

OH MY GOD, I say. Just OH MY GOD.

Well, that and some truly hysterical giggling.
....the tagline they use for the bumper about the Scorpion's present tour:

"The Scorpions...playing anywhere they can plug in."

I'm just picturing poor Klaus Meine -- probably entirely bald by now, rather than simply thinning and frizzy, as he was in the 80s -- wandering from door to door, knocking and asking permission to play "Rock You Like a Hurricane" in people's bathrooms or something.

Lo, how the mighty have fallen.
For those of you who don't know, I am really bad at math. Don't bother trying to teach me math tips and tricks -- this is not a cry for help. It's a simple statement of fact: Dawn is bad at math. Always has been.

It is also important to mention that I took algebra -- both I and II -- a total of four times (yes, there was summer school involved), plus one semester of "College Math" and another semester of "College Algebra." So that's six different maths classes, all between the ages of 14 and 23.** This will be important in a moment.

I am convinced that there is only enough room in my head for a finite number of things. While this number is undoubtedly a very large one, it is still finite, which means that sometimes old information has to make way for new information. That's a fine enough system -- out with the old, in with the new -- but it is an imperfect one, because there seems to be no logic as to what information will be kept and what will be pushed aside.

Case in point )
I am utterly confused and weirdly fascinated by the subculture of slash fan fiction. But it makes no sense to me.

Can anyone out there talk to me about this or get me in touch with someone who can?

Because I don't get it. At all.
...but I am glad that the rest of you tend to be. At least I can read other people's posts.

It's cold in NJ today. Brrrrr...maybe must put the heat on....I suddenly miss FL a whole lot!
Clearly, as you can see, am Queen.

heeheehee
1. Halloween is coming. What will you do this year?
2. Money is no object -- describe your perfect costume, complete with accessories.
3. You've been given money to take a Halloween vacation -- all expenses paid, anywhere in the world, but the catch is that it must be someplace Halloweeny/creepy or you must do Halloweeny things there. Where do you go and what do you do?
4. I'm spending the night in a haunted house -- you coming?
5. Ghosties or ghoulies...pick and monster and tell me why you like him/her/it.
fridayfiver
1. How much TV do you watch?
2. What is your favorite type of programming?
3. What is your favorite TV show?
4. Do you watch a TV show from beginning to end, or are you a flipper?
5. Could you give up TV for a month?

thefridayfive
1) If you came upon a time machine, where would you go? Would you alter anything? Why?
2) If you managed to capture the Questing Beast, an odd combination of animal forms that is said to know the answers to all questions, what one question would you ask it? Would the answer change anything?
3) You've found yourself a rather obedient genie in a bottle. Make your three wishes. Why, out of everything you could ask for, do these three win out?
4) Someone presents you with a working voodoo doll. Do you use it? On who, why, and to what purpose?
5) Pick a superpower, any superpower. What and why? How would this change your life?

answers )
If all things were equal -- benefits, safety, environmental concerns, and the like -- would you rather be a stripper (a stripper by NJ liquor-licensed high-end bar standards, which means stripping down to a bikini or lingerie, no nipples or genitalia showing, bounders at the ready -- not a shithole bar) or a Hooters girl? And why?

PS EDIT Girls, decide from the above; guys, either pretend to be a chick or consider it in terms of which would you rather your girlfriend did and why
Feeling much better today. I won't be online much, as I want to try to get some things done around the house. If you need me, you can call.

Bye for now.
Showering did not necessarily make me feel any *better*. Cleaner, yes, and certainly less slug-like. But it did not alleviate the general groggy feeling and malaise.

It did make me realize all my comfy sweatpants are in the laundry. Poop.
Though the Liberty Travel news helped my spirits. still tired. Still heavy-headed. Not as bad as yesterday, so I have hope for tomorrow.

Wish I had better movies to watch though. And a cheeseburger. I wish I had a cheeseburger. I always want cheese when I don't feel well.

Also wish reading didn't hurt my eyes.

Also wish I had a crown. A real one. With diamonds. And a matching sceptor. (I figured, what the hell-- while I am wishing...)

Off to shower, hopefully without falling down.
Your Existing Situation: Not only considers her demands minimal, but also regards them as imperative. Sticks to them stubbornly and will concede nothing.

Your Stress Sources: Feels that life has far more to offer and that there are still important things to be achieved--that life must be experienced to the fullest. As a result, she pursues her objectives with a fierce intensity that will not let go of things. Becomes deeply involved and runs the risk of being unable to view things with sufficient objectivity, or calmly enough; is therefore in danger of becoming agitated and of exhausting her nervous energy. Cannot leave things alone and feels she can only be at peace when she has finally reached her goal.

Your Restrained Characteristics: Feels trapped in a distressing or uncomfortable situation and seeking some way of gaining relief. Able to achieve satisfaction from sexual activity. Clings to her belief that her hopes and ideas are realistic, but needs encouragement and reassurance. Applies very exacting standards to her choice of a partner and wants guarantees against loss or disappointment. Egocentric and therefore quick to take offense. Sensitive and sentimental, but conceals this from all except those very close to her.

Your Desired Objective: Desires a tranquil, peaceful state of harmony offering quiet contentment and a sense of belonging.

Your Actual Problem: Needs to achieve a stable and peaceful condition, enabling her to free herself of the worry that she may be prevented from achieving all the things she wants.


Your thoughts?
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